In the past three months, I’ve started and not finished no less than ten blogs. Certainly time has been a factor for my lack of blogging.  More so it has been my inner struggle of what to share. I mean I have those internal rules that preclude me from sharing everything. Some of that is for Rachel’s protection.  I want to be honest but not negative and that has been a struggle of late.  I want to give people hope, but I don’t want to be a fraud. I want to share pieces of our journey that provide tools for others to navigate all these systems.  And honestly, I’m overwhelmed. Rachel will be 18 in June. The checklist, the terms, the number of entities to corral, the decisions, the number of people are nothing short of overwhelming.

Then, this happened.

Rachel has not had the opportunity to be in a play at her high school. She loves her high school. She loves the stage. She wants more than almost anything except maybe her boyfriend, pink house, acting on Broadway and “The Happily Ever After,” to be in a play at her high school. High school theater is very competitive. So many talented young people.  Besides my stellar performances in numerous advocacy role plays and providing directing oversight to Earth Person’s routine, my own acting career includes:

• My role as Cousin Agatha in the Rose Bud High School Play my junior year. I cannot remember the name of the play but do know that it is tragic that we did not have social media then because when my friend Cheryl’s ballet tights came unfastened… it should have been captured.
• I was also a character in my senior class play, Desperate Ambrose. I do not remember my character’s name but I’m looking for the picture.
• I was the loving wife in a Christmas musical at 1st Baptist Church, Conway, Arkansas. Mercifully, it required no singing.

I digress. Back to Rachel.

Last spring they announced they would be doing Julius Caesar this year at her school. I’m still trying to get over the students’ thunderous applause because it is a bit dreary for me, but to each his or her own.  Rachel said “I want to audition.” She was encouraged to audition.

Auditions were yesterday.  She has been practicing her lines and introduction for about two weeks. The introduction process for this play, her first non-musical I think, was a bit different from she was accustomed so she had to focus on that. She had her lines memorized and we added reminders to her phone with the process to follow after school so she could audition. Her case manager identified someone to check and be sure she made it to the Blackbox. Rachel is a self-proclaimed “social butterfly” and sometimes she’s gets derailed on her journey, even when it’s this important. She made it, and per our directions, she texted when she was done.

I picked her up and said how was it? She responded that she did great which is pretty much always her response.  Then, with her big smile she said, “Before I went I prayed that I would get any part mom. I will be happy to get any part.”

We could all take a few lessons from Rachel.